For this meal, my friend Steve invited me to a press dinner during Lan Sheng’s opening weeks.  His friend Robert, a writer and respected Chinese food expert would lead our meal through a constant stream of the chef’s finest dishes.  Since it was so early in the restaurant’s existence, I omitted prices since they may have changed.  Certain aspects of the dishes, particularly regarding presentation, may have changed as well.  If you’re confused, feel free to email me: lawrence@nycfoodguy.com

The Favorites

Whole Lobster prepared Szechuan Style

In most Cantonese restaurants whole lobster is traditionally prepared in a ginger and scallion sauce.  Lan Sheng’s fresh, succulent whole lobster was doused in garlic, anise, numbing Szechuan peppercorns and incendiary Szechuan peppers; shiny, bright red and daring you to bite into one.

While I mainly avoided the whole peppers, the bits of cloying garlic and peppercorn attached to the big chunks of briny lobster I peeled from the shell, were some of the best bites of Chinese seafood I’ve ever had. The simultaneously fragrant and fiery peppercorns offered a flavor my taste buds had never experienced.  Little did I know, it was just the introduction.

Ma Po Tofu

The plumes of fragrant steam billowing from this amalgam of tofu, ground pork, leeks, anise and Szechuan peppercorns invaded my nostrils causing little tears to form in the corners of my eyes. Part pleasure, part pain, the tears were a prelude to the revelatory dish of the day.  The combo of fire and fragrance were a credit to the peppercorns and anise, respectively.  At once spicy, numbing and sinus-clearing, I ignored my brain’s fire warning and just kept eating the delicious chunks of tender tofu.  This dish will be a fixture in any future Szechuan meal I eat.

Dan Dan Noodles

Lan Sheng hit the mark on this classic Szechuan dish.  A chili oil based sauce featuring ground pork, Szechuan peppercorns and baby bok choy rests atop a nest of well-cooked noodles.  Upon mixing it all together, I found myself going back to these noodles until they were almost gone.  The complex flavor and numbing heat reminded me of the Ma Po Tofu.  This is another must order dish at any Szechuan meal.

Bird’s Nest Scallops

I’m admittedly not a huge fan of scallops, but the halved chunks of wok-cooked scallops in this dish were excellent.  Crispy around the edges and covered in caramelized, spicy black bean sauce; the scallops were addictive and caused us to rummage through the large chunks of pepper to find more bits of juicy seafood.  The large vegetable chunks are deceptively prevalent, there ended up being a lot more scallop in this dish than it appeared at first glance.

Sizzling Mixed Seafood Casserole with Crispy Rice Cake

“Be careful!” shouted our host Dexter as he carefully placed a covered skillet in the center of our crowded table.  The tiny stream of steam sneaking out the top of the dish erupted into a cloud as Dexter removed the cover and poured a brown sauce over the platter creating a splash and loud sizzle, turning heads at other tables and raising our eyebrows at the savory smell.  Fortunately the presentation didn’t trump the dish.  The diverse textures of the  juicy shrimp, tender vegetables and sweet, crispy rice were enhanced by a surprise fried egg resting at the bottom of the skillet.  The fresh ingredients and the delicate brown sauce all combined for a flavorful and surprisingly light dish.  Unfortunately, the fried egg cooked all the way through and didn’t offer much flavor.

Sizzling Chicken Plate with Spicy Brown Sauce

While engrossed in note-writing with one hand and eating with the other I was surprised to look up and see another sizzling skillet on our table, this one topped with chunks of chicken, sliced green capsicum, thin shards of garlic, and another seemingly superfluous fried egg at the bottom.  Upon first bite, the flavor was undeniably garlic but it was balanced by the lightly sauteed chicken.  As Robert noted, if this dish had some chile peppers and peanuts it wouldn’t be a far cry from the George Costanza favorite Kung Pao Chicken.

Stir Fried Chicken with Spicy Capsicum

Robert put it best when he called the visual presentation of this dish an “inanimate flame.”  Fortunately, you as the eater, have the power to regulate how much heat you’re willing to endure.  If you avoid the whole chili peppers and the spicy capsicum surrounding the crispy pieces of ginger and cayenne crusted chicken, you’ll encounter heat of a more manageable variety.  This is a dish I was curious about trying but upon tasting I was unimpressed by the lack of complex flavor seen in the Ma Po Tofu, the lobster and the Dan Dan noodles.

Braised Sizzling Whole Fish

I didn’t realize how much of a central role sizzling platters played in Szechuan cuisine until this dish, which featured the most austere presentation of the three we tasted.  The tall silver receptacle more closely resembled an ornate ash tray (inset) than a cauldron filled with bubbling oil and delicious strips of fish clinging delicately to its fatty skin.  This dish was tasty albeit a tad oily.  Based on the conversation Robert had with our host Dexter, Lan Sheng is still tweaking this dish and may change the presentation to something less ostentatious.

Golden and Silver Light Buns with Condensed Milk

We started our meal with a dish that would have made a perfect dessert.  Lan Sheng uses puff pastries instead of Chinese buns to create cakey pockets of dough light enough to complement the decadent, super-sweet condensed milk.  The “golden” and “silver” refer to fried and steamed, respectively.  I enjoyed the fried buns more than the steamed.  Surprising, I’m sure.

Dishes To Pass On Next Time

Cold Spicy Deep Fried Fish

One of the most rewarding aspects of writing this website has been the motivation to try everything that’s put in front of me at a restaurant.  While tiny bones in the narrow strips of cold, fried fish provided a bit of a challenge to extract (most of that took place mid-bite), the overall flavor was pleasingly spicy.  I enjoyed this dish more than I thought I would but won’t return to it next time out.

Whole Broccoli in Golden Broth

My sentiments weren’t as rosy for this unfortunately-named dish.  A broth reminiscent of egg drop soup surrounds pieces of well-cooked broccoli.  It was all ladled into small bowls for us to enjoy.  While this would truly make a great dish on a cold winter day, the flavor paled in comparison to most of the other more boldly constructed dishes.

Dumplings: Whole Shrimp Har Gow & Crabmeat Xiao Long Bao (Shanghai Soup Dumplings)

The dumplings at Lan Sheng are well made and thoughtfully flavored but when it comes to a Szechuan meal, I’m looking for more flavor than you’ll find in the dumpling department.  The whole shrimp dumplings (below) deliver on their name featuring juicy, fresh shrimp in very delicate skins.

The crabmeat soup dumplings (not pictured) were equally meaty albeit a little fishier than the shrimp dumplings.  Robert chided me after witnessing me eat my soup dumpling whole.  The proper (and messy) way to eat a soup dumpling is to cradle it in your spoon, bite a tiny hole in the top, and literally suck the soup out of the dumpling until it’s sufficiently drained AND THEN you eat it whole.

Lan Sheng Szechuan Restaurant

Freshly Fried Chive & Shrimp Dumplings

Deep Fried Taro Dumplings

If you’ve never eaten Dim Sum, you MUST read this….

If you have eaten dim sum before, in an authentic Cantonese dim sum house, skip ahead and just enjoy the food porn. In the following sections preceding the food I will try to prepare you for the unique cultural experience you will soon undertake.

There’s one thing you can do to GUARANTEE a thorough and authentic experience: bring one person with you who speaks Cantonese. It’s the language of the dim sum house and having someone with you who has mastered it will make the meal.

“Dim Sum” does not mean “dumplings.” It refers to the entire range of dishes offered at the dim sum house. Dim sum is served from breakfast through late afternoon every day but it draws big crowds on weekends. If you’re going on a Saturday or Sunday, get there early, preferably before noon, because there will most likely be a wait and they sometimes run out of certain dishes.

Jing Fong is a massive dim sum house, so much so that you have to take a very steep escalator up to the vast banquet hall.

The Order Card & Pricing

Once you reach the summit, you’ll be unceremoniously ushered to a table and handed an order card (ask for two order cards, if possible, I’ll explain why later). This card is your key to food. Every time you take a steam basket or plate, this card is stamped. You can’t receive food without it. Don’t lose it and try not to spill on it. In case you still don’t comprehend the gravity of this card’s purpose, I’m going to borrow some lines from the film “Full Metal Jacket”:

“This is my order card! There are many like it, but this one is mine! My order card is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it, like I master my life. Without me, my order cared is useless. Without my order card, I am useless.”

The size of the dish determines price and where it’s stamped. During the week, every plate at Jing Fong, no matter the size , is $2.95. On weekends, prices vary depending on size from $2.95 to $3.95 to $4.95.

Seizing Your Food

Now the culinary onslaught begins. Carts filled with steam baskets and plates of food will be wheeled quickly past you by mainly Cantonese-speaking women who have little to no patience describing what they’re offering. This is where the “seizing” comes into play. Be adventurous, get out of your seat, card in hand, and take a peek at what’s on the cart. Don’t worry about price, nothing will break the bank, if it looks decent, hand over your card in exchange for some food.

The stream of carts moves very quickly and in turn so must you, as the carts pass you by, continue the card/food exchange until you have a nice base of dishes to work through on your table. Don’t stop investigating passing carts or you may miss some of the best dishes. My two favorite dishes didn’t roll past our table until the very end of the meal. Carts, however, are not the only place to get food.

Steam Table Food & Double Order Card Strategy

Here’s where the double order card strategy comes into play. The photo below depicts just the right half of the Jing Fong dining room when you first enter. At the left of the photo, in front of the stained glass wall and orange-clad employees, are the steam tables. Having a second card provides a major advantage because one person at can acquire food from the steam table area while someone else remains at the table acquiring food from the carts. Dumplings are cooked up fresh next to the steam tables, this is an area not to be overlooked.

Let’s Eat, starting with the favorites…

Char siu sou – Puff pastries filled, topped with honey and filled with sweet and savory roast pork. My favorite item of the entire meal was also the last to arrive at our table showing you how important it is to keep an eye out for the items you’re hoping to try.

Chive & Shrimp Dumplings – These are some of the freshest and tastiest dumplings I’ve ever had, mainly due to the fact that they traveled directly from the frying pan to our plate over at the steam table section.

Char siu baau – Pillowy steamed pork buns filled with the same sweet roast pork as the char siu sou above. The dough itself is pretty flavorless but filling.

Deep fried taro dumplings – Beneath the delicate fried taro exterior lies a core of boiled and mashed taro mixed with slightly spicy ground pork. Delicious, it reminded me of a crispy, greasy knish.

Bacon wrapped shrimp – Not as tasty as it could have been because it wasn’t as fresh as I had hoped. The bacon was crisp and dry, the shrimp was juicy and meaty.

Egg Rolls – The crispy and greasy exterior was light and embodied a slightly sweet flavor that was almost dessert-like on its own. Much smaller than your typical egg roll.

Items that were tasty but not terrific…

Steamed Vegetable Dumpling – One of the first items to arrive on our table, the skin was a little gummy but the vegetable filling was fresh and crisp.

Shrimp Har Gow – Har gow refers to wrappers that are steamed until you can see through them. When done right, they’re stickier and a tad chewier than regular dumplings. The shrimp filling was unimpressive.

Siu Mai - Also called “shu mai”, a dish many people have had before at sushi or Chinese restaurants. The wrapper is a lot thinner than the standard dumpling or the har gow, making it easier to one-bite these. Due to the speed at which the siu mai was served and devoured, I can’t recall if there’s meat encased alongside the vegetable filling.

Chicken feet in black bean sauce – Despite being an unlikely source of sustenance, these chicken feet were actually quite tasty, covered in a sauce reminiscent of a sweet General Tso’s sauce. The tiny bit of meat on the feet was surrounded by fat or cartilage.

Disappointing Dishes

Whole skin-on shrimp – As Yao Ming says in the T-Mobile Fave 5 commercial, “Eat the head.” You can eat this shrimp in its entirety, eyes, head, skin and tail but I wouldn’t recommend it. Peel the shrimp and save the trouble of working at the crispy skin. They weren’t very hot upon arrival and really didn’t have much flavor.

Fried soft shell crab – I’d rather return to East Buffet in Huntington, Long Island if I’m going to eat a plate of crab. These crispy soft shell crabs were dry, fishy and not very meaty.

Rice noodle roll stuffed with fried dough topped with sweetened soy sauce – The fried dough within the rice noodle was flavorless and cool. The sweetened soy sauce provided the only detectable flavor. If you have a chance to eat these steaming hot, however, go for it.

Soup dumplings – I was all prepared with my soup dumpling spoon as I punctured the thick, gummy skin and readied myself for the outpouring of soup to come. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much soup inside. If it did exist in these dumplings, soup would have been the defining and most memorable flavor.

Pan fried pork dumplings – Picked from the steam table section, these dumplings were just a mediocre version of the typical pork dumpling.

Rice noodle roll stuffed with shrimp – Like their fried dough-filled family, these shrimp-stuffed rice noodles were equally mundane and lacked any real textural diversity.

Turnip Cake – This pan fried, sweet cake is best when dipped in the accompanying sauce. The crisp outer edges gives way to a firm but slightly mushy interior.

Sticky Rice in Lotus Leaf – Peel back the lotus leaf warpper to reveal a mushy concoction of rice and pork. I was unimpressed by the flavor and would not seek this dish out next time.

Chinese Broccoli – Head to the steam table for an order of watery and lightly-flavored Chinese broccoli.

Curry meatballs – A strong curry flavor overtook these tough and tightly packed meatballs.

Chinese sausage in steamed buns - How bad could this be right? Wrong. The sausages were a little tough and lacked any redeeming flavor. The steamed buns are similar to those of the char siu bauu.

Shrimp and vegetable har gow – A return to the translucent har gow dumpling was not very rewarding, the “pouch-like” construction forced most of the filling to fall out of the dumpling upon first bite.

Fried smelt – Sticking with my goal of being adventurous, we bravely pulled this plate to our table and then proceeded to bite into maybe two of the entire plate’s worth of fish. These arrived crispy on the outside, tender and fishy on the inside, but unfortunately devoid of any heat.

Dishes I didn’t get a chance to try…

Fish balls – After missing out on the first order of fish balls, I balked at the chance to try them again and was greeted with a smile. Apparently, this dish is an acquired taste.

Spare ribs in black beans sauce over rice noodle rolls – Just like the fish balls, I didn’t taste this dish because after trying it himself, King Of Ketchup was unimpressed. Fatty pork meets mushy rice noodles amidst a bland sauce.

Jing Fong

Scallion Pancakes ($3.00)

There’s only two ways to mess up scallion pancakes: overfry or underfry.  The best kind are greasy with crispy edges that reveal thin, silky layers of dough embedded with chopped scallion.  I’ll admit Mee Noodle’s pancakes weren’t perfect, exhibiting a slightly gummy consistency, but compared to the rest of the meal, this was the best move.

The pulled apart pancake below is a testament to the delicacy of each layer of dough and the crisp nature of the outside pieces.  It tastes even better when soaked in the accompanying sauce, which is similar to dumpling sauce.

Mandarin Noodle Soup with Steamed Meat Dumplings ($5.45)

A soup is only as good as its broth and this version resembled a bland, watery attempt at miso soup.  You can choose from seven types of noodles but I would pass on the Mandarin seen below, they are starchy and didn’t taste fresh.

The dough of the four steamed meat dumplings was a little gummy, but overall the dumplings were tasty and provided the only redeeming quality of this soup.

General Tso’s Chicken, White Meat Requested ($10.90)

Whenever I order a chicken dish at a Chinese restaurant, I’ll always pay a little more to receive a dish of only white meat.  If I’m eating fried chicken or roasted chicken, the dark meat is always a more flavorful option, but in the case of Chinese food, I find you get better quality chicken by opting for white meat.  Instead of empty scraps of fried cartilage and skin you get nice chunks of identifiable chicken. Unfortunately, requesting white meat didn’t save this dish.  The chicken was fresh and crisped nicely on the outside but the sauce was sweet and devoid of spice not contributed by the accompanying chili peppers.

So Why Return to Mee Noodle Shop?

• For starters, the prices.  There are few, if any dishes, over $15.  And there’s a “special platters” section offered any time for eat in or take out and every dish is just $5.45.  Dishes include Chicken & Garlic Sauce over rice, Chicken or Beef & Broccoli and Double Sauteed Pork over rice.
• One dish I’d consider ordering upon returning was the Sizzling Shrimp Platter I saw at another table.  It resembled sizzling fajitas and smelled delicious due to the sliced onion also sizzling in the skillet.  You can also get a this with beef, tofu, mixed seafood, and red snapper.
• Another reason to return is that the restaurant offers a full sushi menu in addition to its offerings of noodle soups, sliced meats and traditional Cantonese dishes.

Mee Noodle Shop & Grill (Menu)

• What: Tender, fatty roast pork stewed in its own juices then chopped and covered in lettuce, cilantro, sliced carrot and cucumber and wedged between two halves of a crisp, greasy sesame pancake (similar to scallion pancakes though less flaky). This messy sandwich provides a wonderful confluence of flavor and texture. Add some standard hot sauce (not Sirracha despite the refilled bottles) for extra bite. The vegetable sesame pancake is equally delicious.
• Cost: $2.99
• Where: 220 East 14th Street near 3rd Avenue NY, NY 10003
• Inside info: Combine a sesame pancake with an order of fried pork dumplings ($2.00) and you’ve got a great meal for just over $5.00. Both the fried pork dumplings and steamed vegetable dumplings are reliably delicious. Bite a little hole in the top of each dumpling then squirt in soy sauce for maximum enjoyment. Unfortunately, Vanessa’s can’t satisfy late night urges, they close at 10PM.

But that’s just the beginning. With three massive buffet stations, a sushi bar, a wall of Korean BBQ, a raw seafood bar, and a wall of desserts, it can be overwhelming figuring out a plan of action. Enter King of Ketchup who’s eaten at East at least 15 times and has the buffet strategy down to a science.

King of Ketchup’s strategy, like Zach’s at Midtown Lunch, is all about beating the all you can eat. A lot of it is a result of trying everything East Buffet has to offer and deciding what’s best but…

Four simple concepts are essential for success at every Asian buffet.

1. Don’t eat the salad
2. Don’t order a drink
3. Don’t eat the American Food
4. Don’t eat the bread

East Buffet Plate #1 – Seafood

Shrimp cocktail, steamed crab legs with melted butter for dipping, and a few barbecued prawns make a great appetizer.

De-shelling all this seafood makes every bite more satisfying and makes you even hungrier for plate two. If you’re really famished, I’d go 2 rounds on this plate before making a move to plate 2.

You can see the self-serve presentation of the shrimp and the crab legs. If supplies are running low, mention it to the staff and it’s usually quickly replenished. My only issue with the shrimp is that they’re not deveined, more work for us. The cocktail sauce is very mild unless but you can add some of extra horseradish from the buffet, as you can see in the photo at left.

The crab legs take some work to actually enjoy, but once you get through the shells with the crackers on the tables, you’ll find juicy, hot crab meat just begging to be dipped into some butter sauce. The best time to grab these is when they bring them out fresh, so keep an eye out. Monday is the worst day to eat any seafood, most of it is leftovers from the weekend, so avoid East on Mondays because seafood plays a big role in beating the buffet.

East Buffet Plate #2 – Sushi

From left to right: California roll, Shrimp Tempura roll, boiled shrimp Nigiri.

I’m not a big raw fish guy as you can tell from the plate above, but you can see from the sushi bar at left that the selection is wide-ranging. King of Ketchup, a true sushi eater, raves about the quality of the raw choices and considers this aspect of the buffet to be one of the strongest. Everything I ate was well made and tasted very fresh. I liked the California roll better than the shrimp tempura, the latter of which was a heavy on the batter and avacado but thin on the shrimp.

East Buffet Plate #3 – Entrees

Clockwise from bottom left: Orange Beef, sliced Peking duck with Hoison sauce over a bed of sliced scallion and cucumber, sliced rack of lamb, sliced pork, barbecued prawns, Korean-barbecued shrimp on a skewer.

The duck and the prawns were the stars of this show, followed by the orange beef in order of deliciousness. The prawns, once you de-shell them, are succulent and crisp and the sauce has a nice tang to it. The orange beef was deep-fried and sweet. It was crisp on the outside but slightly dry on the inside, tasty, but in the end not worth the stomach space. No orange flavor was detectable, which I prefer. Don’t be tricked by gummy General Tso’s and lightly sauced chicken and broccoli at this station. Grab a couple of Crab Legs at the far end of the steam table, snag a few barbecued prawns, and move on.

And speaking of moving on, quickly breeze past the generic Chinese food steam table. This is where I found the dry and bland sliced pork. Sweet and sour chicken, fried rice, egg rolls, greasy, cold mozzarella sticks, fries, and onion rings, and really poor attempts at Italian food (e.g. chicken parm) also stand as obstacles in your quest to beat the buffet. Avoid this area at all costs.

The skewered shrimp was tasty but unimpressive. It’s just one of the many offerings on the ledge of Korean barbecue. Everything here is great in concept but low in quality. Despite the allure of charbroiled meat, fatty and dry are the two most applicable adjectives.

I saved the duck (below) and sliced lamb for last because they’re served together at adjoining slicing tables. Sadly, the duck skin was dry and slightly tough, but the meat beneath was moist and decadent. They offer steamed buns (in steamer basket) for you to make little duck sandwiches with, but bread is against the beat the buffet rules. Instead snag some sliced cucumber and scallion, dollop on some Hoison and enjoy it all together. It’s messy but delicious. The lamb on the other hand is an item you can pass on. It’s dry and not very flavorful. One disappointing note about this slicing area, the absence of bone-in prime rib, a delicious item which unfortunately East Buffet no longer offers.

East Buffet Grand Finale – Dessert

Now there are some who will get to this part of the post and say, but wait, I thought you were trying to beat the buffet? Why eat dessert? Well, in all honesty, King of Ketchup’s plan of action involves constructing a soft serve ice cream sundae with chocolate syrup and whipped cream and walls made of thin and crisp coconut cookies. While at East I follow the King’s lead, which is spot on. This sundae is definitely the best possible creation amidst a mass of mediocre cookies and cake. The ice cream is self serve and you can find the cookies further down the dessert wall. The whipped cream is at the end of the salad station buried in ice. You can pass on the chocolate covered pirouette cookies, they’re very generic and don’t add anything to the sundae.

There you have it. A fool proof step-by-step plan for making the most out of East Buffet’s myriad of culinary possibilities.

Let’s review the DOs and DON’Ts:

Do

Go for big money items (duck, sushi, shrimp cocktail, crab legs)

Do Not

Eat salad, bread, drink beer or soda, eat American food, generic Chinese food, or go on a Monday

————–

East Buffet

And here’s the NYC Food Guy inside info: Pay $1.40 extra for white meat and you’ll get freshly cooked General Tso’s the way it’s meant to be eaten. Piping hot with a sweet, spicy sauce covering crispy nuggets of juicy chicken. No cartilage. Only a couple little pieces of nothing but fried skin.

I’ve had this exact dish three times in the last 3 weeks and it has been delicious everytime. Just have some coffee ready because if you can actually finish this massive amount of greasy perfection, a serious food coma is inevitable. Beware the dumplings, by the way, they’re awful, particularly the steamed vegetable variety which looked like mint green play-doh ravioli.

Miss Menu & I hit 6 spots Sunday and were pleased with every spot except one. Read on for bacon wrapped hot dogs, Thai food in a baguette, excellent Sicilian pizza, authentic Mexican tacos, surprisingly good steamed veggie dumplings, and some unique crepes…

First spot we hit up was Vanessa’s Dumplings where we ordered…

Steamed Vegetable Dumplings ($4.49)…

…which despite NYC Food Guy’s carnivorous inclinations, were pretty tasty. Check out the innards.

We also ordered a Sesame Pancake with vegetables ($2.49).

Review:

The steamed veggie dumplings were delicious. They were freshly steamed and very flavorful. Inside I found mushrooms, scallions, cabbage, carrot, and a little tofu.

The sesame pancake, despite its lack of sesame seeds, was spot on. It was fluffy inside and crisp on the outside. The vegetables were fresh and flavorful. Cucumber, cilantro, carrot, bean sprouts, and shredded lettuce were all dressed in a very light vinaigrette-like substance.

Total price with two drinks: $9.65

Open until: 10:30PM

Walking south on 14th street, Thai Me Up was next…

You’re looking at just one half of the Black Pearl Sandwich we ordered…

… Seven vegetables plus chicken in a sweet soy sauce flavored with sauteed Thai seasonings, something our gracious host Amir called “The BBQ sauce of Asia.” Lettuce, tomato, a touch of mayo and some additional spices are added before serving.

Review:

Excellent. When all was said and done, this was my favorite meal of the tour. The Black Pearl Sandwich was a total break from the norm. Steam fried and sauteed mushrooms, corn, cabbage, peppers, carrots, and broccoli, plus lettuce, tomato, a little mayo, sprouts, and some additional spices added post-sautee, all inside a fresh, hollowed out baguette. It was like an entire Thai meal in a sandwich, a revolutionary idea. At first, the Black Pearl Sauce was reminiscent of Hoisin sauce, just spicier and more garlicky. As I continued eating, however, the mayo melded perfectly with the Black Pearl Sauce and the vegetables to create a delicious Thai-flavored juiciness that permeated each crispy, steaming bite.

Here’s how Thai Me Up works:

1. Choose your vehicle: Sandwich, Noodles, or Rice.
2. Choose the filler: Tofu, Chicken, or Beef.
3. Choose a sauce: Black or White Pearl.

Everything is steam fried and sauteed with just a tiny bit of canola oil if necessary and then served to order.

Price: $7.59

Open until: 12AM Friday & Saturday, with later hours come summertime

Turning off of 14th onto 1st Ave, Vinny Vincenz was stop number 3…

Sicilian slices are where it’s at. Here’s a look at the pie…

… and the delicious corner slice I ordered…

They also make a mean Margarita slice, as you can see from this pie shot…

Review:

Vinny Vincenz always gets the job done. Their Sicilian slice is light, airy, and crisp with the cheese to sauce ratio favoring the mozzarella, perfect for a Sicilian. The sauce is sweet but mildly bitter and doesn’t overpower the slice. The crust is crispy but not burnt. It’s airy not doughy or gummy like some lesser Sicilians. This is a great late night spot after a night in the East Village. I’ve left Crocodile Lounge, where they give you a free mini pie with every drink, just for a slice of the good stuff at Vinny Vincenz.

Price: $2.35 for a Sicilian Slice

Open until: 4AM Friday and Saturday

While Miss Menu considered waving the white flag, NYC Food Guy was pumped for stop number four, Zaragoza, on Avenue A off 1st…

This chipotle-chicken taco was spicy and delicious…

Take a look at the juicy chicken…

And a nice, light watermelon soda to wash it all down…

Review:

Forget Tehuitzingo and Tulcingo del Valle on 10th Avenue in Hell’s Kitchen, Zaragoza provided the most delicious and authentic taco I’ve had since the Red Hook Ball Fields. The chicken was moist, tender, and fresh. The bite from the chipotle was subtle at first but combined with the chiles in the tomatillo sauce to provide a serious spice. The tomatillo struck a great balance between the chiles, jalapenos, and garlic, all without being too watery. The double tortilla was essential to support the weight of the lettuce, chopped onions and cilantro, and the chicken and green sauce. The Jarritos, a soda imported from Mexico, was candy-like in its flavor but remained light and not overly sweet.

Zaragoza, unwelcoming and unassuming from the outside, is really just a small Mexican grocery store that happens to serve some homemade delicacies. As I watched the friendly owner sprinkle fresh manchego cheese over a massive burrito, he told me Zaragoza is open until 4AM on weekends, a god send for future East Village nights.

Price: $2.25

Open until: 11PM weekdays, 4AM Friday and Saturday

Good thing stop number five, Crif Dogs, was 6 blocks away on St. Marks and A, I needed time to digest…

Because once we arrived, it was time to feast…

NYC Food Guy ordered the Chihuahua, a bacon wrapped hot dog covered in avocado and sour cream ($4.50, add 50 cents for salsa)…

… while Miss Menu went with a Veggie Corn Dog ($4.75)…

… and we split a small order of Tater Tots ($2.50)…

Review:

Wow. Kind of mind-blowing. The Chihuahua was ridiculously delicious and decadent. The bacon was crispy and melded perfectly with the juicy, beefy dog. The bun was ordinary but it didn’t matter this was a Dog Show. The Veggie Corn Dog was nothing special. It was huge and the batter at the edges was tasty, but it wasn’t cooked enough in the middle. The fake beef flavor of veggie dog was too strong for me.

The Tots, however, would have made Napoleon Dynamite jealous. They were crispy, wafer-like, and potatoey on the inside, delicious in a way lunch ladies can only dream of. Spicy yellow mustard and ketchup graced the table while RC Cola products populated the soda gun and a two-headed Stewart’s Root Beer/Red Birch Beer fountain sat at the side of the counter.

Not enough? Crif Dogs has two, yes two, Ms. Pac Mans in store. One is the sit down variety; the other is the standard arcade. Need more? They also have a three-game arcade featuring Millipede, Centipede, and Catan, the similar game with the space ship.

Resting on the border between the East Village and ABC City, Crif Dogs has no delusions as to who they may be catering to with their offer of “Stoner Packs”. Four artery clogging mystery bags of Crif Dogs’ delicacies starting at $10 and ascending $10 more from Pack 1 to 4, the latter something they claim you will never be able to finish.

Price: $7.50 each

Open until: 1AM Sun. & Mon., 2AM Tues. thru Thurs., & 4AM Friday & Saturday

Full yet? NYC Food Guy always has room for dessert. But maybe he should have passed on Cecel Cafe Crepe…

… Where the unique crepes come shaped like ice cream cones and filled with pastry-cream. I ordered the large Apple Tatin…

… which looked like this…

… and like this from above…

Miss Menu wanted some straight up Nutella but the crepe-man misheard and added the pastry-cream…

Review:

Disappointing. The crepes, though thin and cooked fresh, didn’t retain any heat as a result of the refrigerated pastry-cream. The cream itself was what you’d find in a cream puff. Tasty but nothing special. The apples in my crepe were also unheated and as a result my overall reaction was lackluster. Miss Menu was even more disappointed. As if it wasn’t enough that she dealt with her botched order, the Nutella was fake. Yes, impostor Nutella. It was obvious something fishy was going on when it was squeezed from a sauce bottle and it was even more obvious upon first bite. It clearly says Nutella on the menu, but unlike a rose, Nutella by any other name, is not still Nutella.

Price: $4 for the small, $6 for the large

Open Until: 12AM Sunday through Thursday, 2AM Friday & Saturday

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Phew. Part I is complete. I’m comfortably full. Then again it’s two days later and I’m still comfortably full. I jest. Truly, this was a great experience. I still have about 35 places on my East Village to do list and I’m pretty pumped for Part II, so keep your eyes peeled eaters because the fun has just begun.

Vanessa’s Dumplings

Thai Me Up

Vinny Vincenz

Zaragoza

Crif Dogs

Cecel Cafe Crepe