“Salsa Picante” Mac & Cheese Special at S’Mac for One Month Only

February 24, 2010

This is the love child of nachos, Velveeta salsa dip and mac and cheese. The photo of the glowing orange cheddar-tortilla crumb crust below doesn’t reveal much of the Salsa Picante’s innards but that’s because there’s not much to show. S’Mac’s description of the Salsa Picante ($7.75), “Pepper Jack, Cheddar, Salsa, Chicken Breast, and Cilantro,” is more like nacho-flavored crust above creamy, mildly spicy, salsa-flavored cheese sauce sparsely studded with green pepper and onion, mingling with chunks of ordinary, flavorless chicken breast. If you order the Salsa Picante, get it with no chicken. With the exception of beef in the Cheeseburger S’Mac, eaters should steer clear of adding meat to their S’Mac. Whether it’s slab bacon or chicken, the meat’s lack of flavor and chewy texture only decrease enjoyment. The option to add freshly sliced jalapeno peppers, something S’Mac does not provide, would really improve the Salsa Picante. There was an actual upside to this experience, so read ahead to find out…

Like the creme-brulee-esque four cheese S’Mac with bread crumbs, the best bite features nothing more than the top layer of slightly crisped cheese (asking for it well done didn’t offer any extra char) mixed with the revelation of the day: tortilla crumbs! Just imagine the possibilities! Mexican chicken cutlets! A bacon-wrapped, deep fried hot dog covered in a cheesy, tortilla crumb crust! Bizzaro world nachos where tomato, onion and cilantro stand in as the chips and tortilla crumbs and cheese are the topping! As Martin Short once said in the underrated comedy “Clifford,” “My heart. … It hurts.”